Have you considered spanking him?

Since Phillip could walk, and long before his autism diagnosis, I heard it all from people on the outside looking in. An autism parent is constantly judged, stared at, and we do see the look on the faces of disgust. My son likes to run. He isn't running away from us or being naughty he is trying to take in all that is around him. Many times I let him set the pace and stand back while he touches things. Thankfully I do have this kind of time on my hands.

Taking him to public functions has always been difficult. Grocery stores are a nightmare, not so much the shopping but checking out. Getting him to stand still while I unload groceries and pay is actually an impossible task.

What I miss is being able to stand back and watch my older kid’s school functions. We go, but I am not normally able to just sit and watch. His siblings understand but it doesn't mean they don't miss it too. I have been more then blessed with older kids who help, even when they are as tired as I am.

I have always understood Phillip will run. Phillip will be affected by sounds, lights, crowds, movement, and smells. When an entire room goes quiet, Phillip is too busy to grasp he needs to do the same.

So, what happens when you understand this about your child and society doesn't? The unwelcome advice and judgment starts to role in. Any parent of an autistic toddler can relate to some of these comments. You just need to socialize him more, he needs discipline, you’re coddling him too much, you need to put him in a daycare, and you’re not doing enough.

Some of my favorite comments over this past year have been... I didn't even know you were in the grocery store today! That one I took as a compliment because that meant we had an easy day shopping. Or the passersby who say, someone is tired, and my response to that is always...yes I am! You just need to spank him...I actually couldn't even respond to that one for obvious reasons. My sarcastic personality would have made responding comparable to a freight train collision.

The bottom line is we know our son and we know his nature. I also know anyone on the outside looking in has no understanding of how hard we work as a family to keep up with him, and we don't complain because we know he needs us.

If you are reading this and you can relate, remember when that judgment comes rolling in...Imagine that person watching your child for even a short time. You might find just the thought of them trying to keep up and ending up curled up in the fetal position crying makes you giggle, because the strength you give your child, like autism, is one of a kind.