Sunday, January 29, 2017

Punk Rock Heroes

   If had to give one piece of advice to a parent and only one, it would be to have all the right people in your life. I wouldn't preach diets, apps, therapies, or any other method to help your child above having the right people around. What do I mean by the right people?  I mean people who don't give a damn about autism.  People who treat your child and you like nothing is different in your life.  People who know it's different but never make you feel that way and just flat out accept it all without question. People who get that autism makes life different but rarely make an issue of it. Those are the people you need, we all need.

   Today my son decided he finally wanted to go see his favorite local punk rock band, The Fibs, play.  A big deal for him because even though he is a huge fan he struggles with being overwhelmed and has always refused in the past.  He listens to the music, watches Youtube videos, knows all the band members but seeing them play has just not been an option in his mind.  Today he decided he could do it and it ended up being the best day of his life.

   There was no trick or tactic I used to get him there or make it an epic day.  The entire reason it worked and was the greatest day ever for him was all the right people.  At one point he nearly lost it and refused to go back into the building but the lead singer of his favorite band said just a few words to him and he pulled it together to not miss the reason he was there.  When they began to play he was right up front and jumping around.  Then he found himself with the microphone and being lifted on stage to stand with the four guys he admires.  Although slightly terrified he did not lose his cool at all.  After the show he was given a job to help carry band equipment and that simple act of kindness was icing on the cake for him.

   You can do all the therapies possible, try every diet on earth, utilize every autism tactic or advice there is but in the end what really makes the biggest impact is who is in your child's life and how they treat you.  My child is lucky enough to look up to four of the coolest guys in world. They just see a kid who looks up to them and that's all that matters. If someone asked me 3 years ago if I could see my son at a punk rock show on stage with a microphone in his hand I would have laughed hysterically but today that's what happened because of all the best people and only because of that.

   Huge thank you to The Fibs for being the kind of people I want my son to admire and strive to be like. Along with creating some crazy good music so many people love!

3 comments:

  1. That's awesome. I'm still at the point where I'm laughing at the thought of my son (4, diagnosed 6 months ago) being on stage but I know anything is possible. That is so cool your son found that joy. I can see my own son in your's facial expression. You must be a great dad to be as attentive as you are and aware of your boys limitations. I know I am. This life was not what I was expecting but I love my son more than life itself and would do anything for him. From one parent of an autistic kid to the next; solid work,and I am very very happy for you and your son.

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    1. At 4 years old life was entirely different here. Almost total isolation and taking him out of the house was an extreme challenge. He could barely transition, communication was body language only, and he was terrified of males. He would literally drop to the ground and cry if an unfamiliar male spoke to him at all. Music was barely an option because sound caused him so much stress. ABA through Easter Seals Olympic Peninsula Autism Center has played a major role in his progress and the friends we have made that have become family. Anything IS possible and so much can change! Believe that and thank you.=)

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  2. Thank you so much but I cannot take credit. This was written by Phillip's mother. I am not the child's father, just a friend in a rock n roll band Hopefully I'm not responding for the third time I'm a little computer illiterate and have tried a few times before. We met Phillip a year or two ago. When we did I had no idea he had autism and still I just see a shy kid with a few querks, but who doesn't have a few querks. He melted my heart when he was asked who he wanted at his last birthday party and he immediately said "the FibS". So when a kid says come to his birthday party you load up on presents and go, right? We didn't set out to do this as a favor or a charity, we did this because we love him and he is a huge fan. We did it because that's what we do, we like to include the ones that love us the most in everything we can include them in.

    Thank you so much for the kind words. The sky is the limit for my friend Phillip Fib and the same rings true for your son. You are more than welcome to bring your boy to one of our all ages shows. We'd love to meet you and him both. Remember though we are a loud, brash, and sometimes offensive rock n roll band but it's all for the positive message and good cheers.

    Thank you again, much love
    Shaun Fib

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