A study that will never happen.

                The blasted vaccine debate has risen again this morning and the arguments that follow are all over the map. Studies this studies that followed by the words assumption, fact, proven, saves lives, be careful, fear propaganda, and inconclusive. Possibly why it took me so dang long to accept and admit I watched the regression of my child happen right before my eyes. Those crazy vaccine haters and all of their lack of correct information and conspiracy theories is what many people think. It honestly makes a parent want to keep an opinion to themselves if they know it played in role in autism for their child. No one wants to be looked at as crazy or ignorant on top of managing autism and keeping a family functioning on a daily basis. You don’t want a finger pointed at you for saying a large dose of vaccines stole the light from your child’s eyes but it has happened, to so many people I don’t even understand why the argument still goes on.

                I stay out of these arguments simply because I am not for or against vaccines. I am not against them because diseases that kill or harm children need to combated but I am not for because there is no procedure to test a child’s body for safety before they are administered. Before is the key word there because it is my belief the conflict is in the structure of the body not the actual vaccine created to protect us. I have read hundreds of studies like most autism parents until my eyes can’t read one more word. My brain can’t take one more dose of information, no pun intended. I can’t stand one more argument of parents attacking each other with the words in the first paragraph and if I see the word debunked one more time it might take a vaccine for insanity to bring me back from the land of confusion so many of us are wandering around in. The word study has taken on a whole new meaning for me entirely. Out of 50 studies I read I am lucky to come across 2 that seem to hold some real information that helps the cause one way or another. My faith in the word study alone has drastically diminished over time in regard to the science of autism. I am no educated scientist but often I read an article and I can’t figure out if an educated scientist actually conducted the study in the first place.

                Here is the study I am waiting for and it is not based on 100 kids from 1991 or a phone call made to people’s homes with questions about autism. It goes something like this; it starts with a phone call to thousands of homes by doctors all over the country. It’s a phone call to notify thousands of families a study is being conducted on autism beginning today vaccinated or not. It gives people the option to have genetic testing done to rule in or rule out any other differences that may have conflicted with vaccines or any other environmental conflict. It is now going to be part of the autism program for those who would like to participate because 1 in 88 or 1 in 50 need answers to the constant debates that tear the cause apart. The person on the phone will say “we have the science to begin this study because we have a giant list of possibilities, and what we need is current testing on the structure of how the autistic immune system works. We are going to check for toxic levels of whatever might be affecting your child, if any because we have the science to do it. If you would like to participate please make an appointment now, today with thousands of other families.”

                This will never happen and there are a couple of reasons why, number one it would cost millions of not billions of dollars to do. Number two it would answer to many questions and end too many debates with current scientific information that would make a whole lot of people very very mad. What would happen if this was done and it was discovered people have been affected by autism because of human error? How would they tell people that without providing lifelong care or compensation? How would they say to someone, “we missed something in your child’s body that is different and if we had tested for this early on, things may have been different for your child.” They can’t do this because no matter what, someone would have to be held accountable and no one on earth would ever be willing to take that kind of accountability.

                Next time this debate rises in front of you no matter what side of the debate you may be on, try to keep in mind studies show has become a statement with no backbone. If someone says my child was born with autism then they were. If they say my child faded after a big dose of vaccines then they did. Until we all get that phone call with the option to find out, which I can imagine would still give all of us different answers be kind and care about each struggle. Give support to each other and respect different opinions because that is a difference we all need to instill in ourselves for each other.