Writing This From a Padded Room....

                 It finally hit me the other day, the crash of autism information overload. Nearly to the point I was going to go into my own meltdown and nothing would have helped. I am all for building an understanding and acceptance in fact it’s all I want for autism, along with an education plan that gives them all a fair chance in a school system.

                Advocacy, research, healing, therapies, vaccine propaganda, and If I saw one more baseball hat with a puzzle piece pop up on my computer for ten dollars I was going to throw my own hat in and wash my hands of it all. Well, not autism because that is here for good and I am perfectly comfortable with that. I finally started to realize why people can’t or don’t care to understand autism and it actually made me a bit angry. Not only is it a complicated difference but all the media and networks connected are really just one big mess. Don’t get me wrong they do great things and those things are needed but who is deciding what those things are? Is it people who have lived years with autism because I am confused as to why all these things are going on yet no one can find great resources for their children. Yes, some people are lucky enough to find excellent systems but there are so many who are just left standing in one place.

                Then I see the new line of school supplies Autism Speaks has created to sell through Wal-Mart. Autism Speaks is putting a ton of money into research and they are a huge system working for autism. I had to wonder what profit Wal-Mart gets from that deal. It’s a major corporation and they don’t do anything out of the kindness of their hearts, so there has to be a substantial profit or large market for what they sell. When did autism become a commodity and who decides school supplies is going to help families? I know there is more to it then what we see but how ironic the worst place to take my autistic child is the one chosen to distribute such a silly product. Even if I needed school supplies and at this point I am not sure, wait I am positive, the school system where I live is not set up for educating an autistic child the healthiest way possible. The irony all around is just too much for a parent and I know I am not the only one who feels this way.

Today I spent in recovery from the wave of autism chaos most of America is wrapped up in. One of the things that helped me get back on track was a young man at the grocery store yesterday. He was the box boy and was playing a bit with Phillip. I could see he was excellent with kids just by the way he interacted with him even if Phillip didn’t react like most kids would. He carried my groceries out the van and we chatted a bit. I explained to him that it is hard for a stranger to get a smile out of Phillip and it was a good thing to see. He asked me why he was so shy and I told him he was autistic. This is the part you feel the apologies rushing towards you like you just told them you had a death in your family=0. Rarely is the reaction anything different than apologies and discomfort but at that moment his eyes lit up and he smiled a huge smile towards Phillip. That’s when he said “my brother is also autistic.” He said this with great appreciation for autism and for that I wanted to hug that kid right there in the grocery store parking lot. Glad I didn’t or I might be writing this from a padded room. Hugging the box boy is not a socially acceptable thing to do…but his reaction wasn’t what I would call the social norm either.

So there it is. Buy pencils, hats, a necklace or magnetic bumper sticker for your Minnie van. The only real thing that is going to create understanding and awareness is having your life touched in some way by autism.