You're going to be a mom and you're going to LOVE IT!

                

                Motherhood is so funny and such a life altering event it’s hard to put into words. I remember as a kid hanging out with my friends, all moms now, talking about what we would be doing when we got older. I couldn’t even begin to imagine myself at 36 so thinking that far ahead was totally out of the question.  I never said I wanted children and most of my friends would say one child and that funny statement we make as kids “and I will be there friend.” No way will we be the kind parents our parents were with all those dang rules and all of that parental control. It’s all so funny to me now because not only are we all moms but we all have more than one child, and we all practice parental control. Every once in a while you get a glimmer of friendship but most of the time you are a parent.

                I try to imagine what I would have said 25 years ago if I was to say exactly what my life would actually be one day. One day I will do load after load of laundry no matter how crusty a sock is I am going to touch it. I am going to cook dinners no one likes and then I am going to clean it all up day after day. I am going to get up really early every day and stay up late every night. I am going to drive a minivan and still call myself cool and sometimes I will get to turn up the radio. All of my shopping will be at a grocery store and I will go so often due to short term memory loss those checkers will know me by first name basis. I am going to get puked on, pooped on, and peed on so much that the smell will not faze me one bit. I am going to say really uncool things like, “turn that music down! It’s angry and makes my brain hurt.” Or “no, you are not wearing that shirt to school, or anywhere else.” I am even going to say things I don’t want anyone to hear me say like, “gross! Put that dog poop down right now!” Or “That’s not a toy, now give mommy the hammer please.” I am going to wear sweatshirts and sweat pants all the time because one day I am just going to forget how to dress up and won’t care much, plus the grime of motherhood seems to go unnoticed in a ratty sweatshirt. No one will make me feel special every day for working so hard for no pay, I will just know what I am doing is special by watching it all come together in a way that appears I look like I know what I am doing.

                If I could write down my life and take it back to my ten year old self to read my ten year old self would cry and possibly find the nearest cliff to jump off of. My 36 year old self would smile and say “you’re going to be a mom and you’re going to LOVE IT!”